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  • Writer's pictureAmanda R

People pleasing = exhausting

Are you a people pleaser?

Do you ever feel torn between saying "Yes" or "No" to things because you fear that saying "No" will cause discomfort or tension between you and the other person?

Maybe, of all years, you're faced with having to make the difficult decision of not being with family this year because we're living through a pandemic. Maybe Mom, Dad or a sibling has made you feel guilty for saying "No" because you don't want to take the risk of getting a loved one sick.

I understand how it feels to be conflicted with making the right decision and wanting to avoid emotional discomfort if there were to be a negative response to said decision. No one should feel this way.

People pleasing = exhausting

Here's what you can do:

  1. Learn to accept that your decisions are exactly that... YOUR DECISION.

  2. Recognize that your RSVP is based off of being safe (this year).

  3. What if you feel bad for saying "No" but know that it's the right thing to do? Remind yourself that not going is for safety precautions and next year will be different. Breathe and bring yourself back to the present. This is actually a great time to begin creating stronger boundaries.

Creating boundaries is necessary and takes practice if you're a chronic people pleaser like I once was. Start by saying "Maybe" or "I'll think about it" if you can't say "No" right off the bat. After consistent practice, it gets easier.

I hope these help! Let me know how it goes.



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